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Temper, temper!
Last weekend I was out shopping for art supplies
and one particular item on my list is a stack of blue pencils.
When I arrived at the store where I usually buy my supplies,
I found a mug full of assorted colored pencils on a wall shelf
behind a counter. It was beyond reach so I asked the sales
lady to see if there are blue pencils in the mug. I was expecting
for her to take down the mug and look at it but to my surprise
she just quickly ran her fingers on the pencils and said in
the most tactless manner that those were just ordinary pencils
and they didn’t sell blue pencils at all.
That really ticked me off because my pencils
at home had a sticker price tag with their store name. She
could’ve at least shown me that there weren’t any
available. I even wouldn’t mind to rummage through the
assorted pencils myself if she was lazy to do so. However,
her lack of courtesy made me feel stupid and worthless. Right
there and then, I was ready to blow my top and demand to see
her supervisor. Fortunately for her and myself, I just left
without so much of a fuss and bought my supplies at a different
store. If I were in one of my nastier mood swings, she could’ve
heard an earful of cursing. That sales lady had been lucky.
 I’m
sure we all have had similar experiences. However, how many
of us have let our emotions get the best of ourselves? Feeling
anger is a completely normal human emotion and is even healthy
for us at certain occasions. However, it is also one emotion
that you can easily lose control of. And when you do lose
control of it, the effects can be detrimental not only for
your career but also your personal well being.
In fact, my father was once hospitalized due
to an alarmingly high blood pressure caused by office politics.
And if I recall correctly when I was still in preschool, two
of my uncles almost killed each other when their argument
and emotions boiled out of control. Believe me, the sight
of two grown men brandishing kitchen knives and threatening
each other will be forever engraved in my memory.
Furthermore, being prone to anger can cause
insomnia, headaches, and digestive problems. Our body also
releases stress hormones that can raise blood pressure and
heart rate. Edward C. Suarez, Ph.D., assistant professor of
psychiatry at Duke University Medical Center, says that too
much stress hormones “can raise your cholesterol, thereby
clogging arteries and possibly leading to a heart attack.”
Since we cannot easily turn off our emotions
like a faucet, it’s important that we must learn to “manage”
our anger in a productive manner. Different people have different
ways of managing their emotions but a lot of people often
resort to violence in order to vent out their frustrations.
Internalizing or keeping our anger to ourselves isn’t
also healthy as it could lead us to overeating, misuse of
drugs and alcohol, and even severe depression. A lot of people
also tend to suppress it for a period of time until it bursts
out at the slightest provocation like a ticking time bomb
waiting to explode.
A good way of venting anger when faced with
an explosive situation is to simply ask for a time out. This
may sound a little childish but it is the best way to deal
with a tense situation. Taking a short time out can help you
regain composure and the needed break to organize your thoughts.
Some people would advice counting from one
to ten or higher but that rarely works. You’re better
off taking deep breaths than doing so. Even visualizing something
pleasurable like having your favorite dinner or going fishing
can do wonders in calming yourself down.
If you can’t go away for a time out and
feel that you are about to reach your boiling point, lower
your voice instead. Speak slowly to reduce your emotional
level. And if you are arguing with someone, it’s most
likely that the person arguing with you would lower his or
her voice as well.
Taking the time to talk things over can also
diffuse a lot of ill feelings. If a person annoys you, you
shouldn’t wait until you are stark raving mad before
you confront that person. You should approach that person
immediately and politely express your concerns. I know it’s
a hard thing to do considering that we have a culture of tolerance
but a lot of people are very reasonable if you approach them
politely. In fact, I’ve made friends with some of my
worst enemies already.
Anger is a very common human emotion and feeling
such can even be an indication that we are living a healthy
life. As much as we would like to avoid feeling angry, it
is impossible to do. Life is full of difficulties that will
challenge the very fabric of our being. We should accept that
things often do go wrong and that anger will be inevitable.
However, we shouldn’t let anger affect our lives because
it will be difficult for us to see the rainbow after the storm
when all we see is red. *
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